Curtis, part twenty-nine

Leta had been in a deep sleep, so it took her a few moments to realize that her husband was lifting her nightgown in an attempt to consummate their marriage. For a moment, she started to anticipate the flush of emotion that would come from his affection, but then she remembered where she was and that Curtis had been deceitful to her about the automobile, which he led her to believe was his, but actually belonged to a neighbor. Then he accused her of harboring feelings for the neighbor who had come earlier that day to claim the vehicle. She had no interest in any affection from him.

“Curtis?” she whispered, “What are you doing?”

“Lie still,” he commanded quietly, as he fumbled with himself.

She could feel the weight of his chest against hers as he attempted to balance himself. He was breathing heavily, expelling air into her face that smelled of day-old coffee grounds. She had not opened her eyes, not that it would have mattered. Their bedroom had one small window that left it in nearly total darkness.

“I’m tired,” she said, wriggling to her side.

“You’re my wife,” he stated, as if that was explanation enough for her to engage.

“You’re my husband,” she said, almost mockingly. “Now go to sleep.”

She felt his hand on her shoulder and wondered if he was going to turn her onto her back and proceed with his intention. Was he trying to remind her of their union by this unexpected and uncharacteristic aggressive act? Was he so jealous of her meeting their neighbor that this was the only means he could utilize to exert his claim to her? Or was he trying to prove to himself that he was a valuable husband? He had fathered twelve children with his first wife; he must have some capability at sexual relations.

However, she had no interest in his affection at this time. Her day had been long and filled with work. She had wanted to go into town in the afternoon to make some purchases, telephone her children and simply see and speak to other adults. Spending her several days maintaining a household for fourteen and only speaking to children was wearing on her. Then to learn that the automobile that she had believed belonged to her husband was actually borrowed from a neighbor diminished her husband. That he also believed she was enamored of the older neighbor had driven her directly from the supper table to bed.

While she cared little that her husband was sharing the bed with her, she had no interest in engaging with him in conversation, let alone sexual intimacy.

“Curtis, I’m very tired,” she repeated firmly.

He continued to breathe beside her and finally released her, rolling back to his side of the bed. She relaxed but remained in that position until she could hear the heavy breathing that signified he was asleep. Then she eased herself back to sleep.

But she did not sleep very well. At any moment, her husband might demand that she, as his wife, satisfy his desire, and she was concerned that he might force himself upon her.

She finally rose several minutes before the alarm to begin her day—only her fifth full day of marriage to Curtis.

To be continued.